And you bask in the cliché of it and realize…

Sometimes things are going along and then something happens out of the blue that completely changes your tone for a while.

It happened to me today.  I was re-hashing all of my (very) first-world worries with a student* who dropped by for a bit and then my email pings and I get this:

Hi there!

I LOVE everything I’m seeing about your life. If I were  in Chicago, I would be taking your classes! And I drool over the  culture you’ve created in your workroom.

I know the years in  between are overflowing with joys and sorrows that make us who we are  today. But I look at pics of your workroom and I am transported back to  that slow moving train from Italy, walking through tunnels of  hydrangeas, and a place and time where critical thinking and classic  theoretical exploration were encouraged. And I miss it.

I’m  starting my European job search because it’s time to get out of the  desert. My brain dries up a little more with every passing year.  THANK  YOU for keeping me focused! Please keep the blogs and pics coming.

Macht’s Gut!

Erin

I kept re-reading that first line again and again.

“I LOVE everything I see about your life…”

“I LOVE everything I see about your life…”

“I LOVE everything I see about your life…”

Let me copy that again…

“I LOVE everything I see about your life…”

Because really, I haven’t been loving my life.

In fact, there has been very little about it lately that gives me any joy at all.

Erin and I went to college together and then spent time in Switzerland at Franklin College in Lugano. We have lost touch (almost) completely over the years, but she saw the class blog I just revived and felt compelled to send that note. And what a difference it made in my day.

And that did it. I have been able to create this thing – with my own hands – and make it work. Sometimes it hasn’t been pretty, but there is something to this.

Something real. Something outside of our ridiculous consumerist culture. Something that makes a difference. Something that teaches people and makes them think!

AND I DID IT.

MYSELF**

And it was hard and I suffered and had setbacks and thought I would lose it and that it didn’t matter.*** But it does and was really good to hear.

* Who is turning out to be a friend – who knew?
** Not really, but it is a nice illusion when you are trying to pump yourself up.
*** To get the proper cadence of that sentence going through my mind you should really read it:

“AnditwashardandIsufferedandhadsetbacks
(and inhale)
andthoughtIwouldloseitandthatitdidn’tmatter.”